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Oh and just to be clear: Commenting on how a woman could be your Nubian queen or your sweet Oriental flower is not substantive.

I’m terrible at dating in general, but my go-to online dating move is to get a message from someone cute, and never ever respond. So, when Robyn Exton, the CEO at Her (stylized as HER), a dating app centered on lesbian, bi, and queer women, asked me if I was interested in their latest study on the best hacks for their app, a small, scathing, and very single voice inside me hissed, "You need this." The PR photos didn’t hurt.

Funny is good, but if you are not actually funny, don’t strain anything trying to be.

Straightforward and nice is infinitely better than trying to be funny and failing miserably. There are lots of reasons why someone might not message you back. Now have patience, or set your sights on one of the 10,000 other single people in your area.

We all want to get laid and we all have our sexual proclivities, and if we like something in particular we may mention it on our dating profile.

But even if there’s a recognition that we, like almost every other adult human being, sometimes enjoy having our genitals touched, there’s no need to go all porno upon first introduction. Until you’ve gone actual porno in real life, leave the porno-chat alone.

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