Orthodox jewish speed dating

I want those schnooks back in my office right after lunch! By all means if you have a favorite, post and share!

“Rabbi, we’ve prepared a special feast in your honor, with the best meats, fish and cakes.” “Who may I ask, prepared the meat? “Our finest chef, Elijah Manoshevksy.” ”And who is the Mashgiach? “Thanks very much,” said the Rabbi, “but I’ll just stick with the fish.” We Jews have been known to be determined and independent when it comes to beliefs, traditions, and making sure everything is “kosher.” What can we say – we take our kosher food seriously. Eye Chart & More When Izydor Epstein from Poland applied for an American driver's license he was asked to read the eye chart. " replied Izydor, "the man used to be my next-door neighbor!

Tim exclaimed: “Make mine Hawaii --with beauty queens! The Jewish boss, like We Jews, was not only skeptical (a miracle not in a desert? Just for fun, I'm going to bring over three women and you guess which is “the one.” Mama and Papa agreed. Her advice column was syndicated through Tribune Media Services, and it currently appears in Singular magazine as Singular Solutions.

" And so we have the difference between “them” and “us.” The two non-Jewish workers believed. Her, we don't like." I’ve had controversial reactions on this one from at least one rebbetzin I know. Quirky, no-nonsense, funny, Marnie – writer, editor, author, lecturer, clinician, and administrator -- is a straight-shooter, who has a distinctive voice and takes on the world in her columns, features, and books.

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During one service in a wealthy synagogue, the rabbi got carried away.

Explore the history of the Mediterranean, feel the balmy breezes of the Bahamas and the Caribbean, or just sit back and relax while you cruise across the Atlantic.

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) but delivered a delicious punch line differentiating “them” and “us.” And while we’re on the subject … The next day he brought three beautiful women who sat on the sofa and chatted with Mama and Papa over a little cake. Marnie has written over 20 books/calendars, including the series “A Little Joy, A Little Oy." Her books include Yiddishe Mamas: The Truth About the Jewish Mother and A Little Joy, A Little Oy (pub. She is also an award-winning “calendar queen” having written over 20.

Items that are of a personal nature, for which there is a fair and reasonable charge.

Not included in the cruise fare are items that are of a personal nature including gratuities, shore excursions, airfare, telephone calls, faxes, spa treatments, salon services, photographs, laundry and valet service as well as wine, liquor and other beverages. PORT HIGHLIGHTS AND EXCURSIONS – Kosherica offers some beautiful Jewish interest excursions in these ports as detailed below:• Barcelona – visit the Jewish quarter and learn about the incredible Jewish history followed by a bus tour to take in some of the magnificent architecture that Barcelona is famous for.• Rome – learn about the 23 centuries of Jewish history in the first part of your tour which includes the Jewish Ghetto and breathtaking synagogue.

Some you may know, others may be new, but all are: a) quintessentially Jewish; b) literally put me into hysterics – and still do; and c) are classics (or should be). So for you, dear readers, I bring you my absolute faves. The clergyman entered to start services: "Will all non-Christians please leave." Avram continued davening." Again the clergyman said, "Will all non-Christians please leave." And again, Avram prayed. "Will ALL JEWS please leave." At this, Avram removed his yarmulke, packed up his tallis, then went to the altar, picked up a statue of Jesus and said, "Come bubbela they don't want us here anymore." Our ultimate joke about Jesus as a Jew. ” Some 50 years ago we Jews were often accused of Christ’s death until the Pope absolved us in the 1950s. " “The one in the middle with the red hair,” his parents replied instantly. has listed Marnie Macauley on their list of top Jewish_American writers, dead or living.

I challenge anyone who would dare say there’s “no such thing as ‘Jewish’ humor! Like that girl with the curl, when a Jewish joke is good it’s very very good and showcases our unique Jewish spirit, wit, and yes, often sarcastic brand of humor. Could there be a funnier or sharper way to respond? “How can you sit there when the ship may be sinking?! (She’s still deciding which.) She was also chosen as a Distinguished Woman in Las Vegas in March of 2014.

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