He might reframe the woman’s intelligence—a trait he claimed to value dearly—in an unflattering light, casting her as cold, pretentious, or a cookie-cutter know-it-all, when, in fact, his ego was threatened.
If any of us could access our unconscious, we’d see that we pick partners and stay with them based not on lofty, abstract ideals, but on how they make us feel.
As for single guys, there’s a little-known benefit for those who genuinely prefer women who are smarter than they are.
Park’s latest research found that these men, once primed with romantic thoughts, actually perform better than they otherwise would on science and math tests.
The task led to a drop in men’s implicit self-esteem, as did news that their girlfriend outscored them on a social-intelligence test.
But then, out of nowhere, a gnawing insecurity gripped me. All of the information provided by Suzanne gave me that knowledge and confidence.” TWEET THIS I freaking love this quote.This time, they had to rate their degree of closeness to their partner beforehand, as well as afterward, which made them reflect on the warmth and affection they felt for each other.For those who were close to their lovers, the news of that person’s superior test results appeared to actually activate feelings of connectedness and an affirmation of the relationship’s value. “The more the male partner can focus his thoughts on the ‘team’ aspect of the relationship, the better he copes,” says Rebecca Pinkus, a psychologist at Western Sydney University who researches strategies that couples use to overcome divisive comparison.The hopeful news is that men can feel great—even when a female partner outperforms them—if they view the relationship itself as an emotional resource.A study based at the University of Toronto used the familiar setup in which men (and women) are told that their real-life significant other scored higher on an intelligence test.